AJHS - 10

Part - 10

Arnav POV

When I replied to Khushi with a flirty message there were many reactions that I expected to receive in return. Shyness. Ignorance. Anger. But even in my wildest dreams, I did not imagine that Khushi Gupta would put forward a request to meet me. I became restless after that. My mind skirted to a different angle.

Is there a slight probability that she has feelings for me? Maybe my jealousy towards Siddharth Shukla was a little too obvious. And that made her read between the lines. She cares for me. She offered me her friendship. She thinks I am adorable. So chances are high that Ms Gupta likes me.

I could not sleep at all. The entire night I sat on the bed leaning against the headboard clutching my phone seeking protection from the unknown emotions that overwhelmed me. If tomorrow or rather today Khushi confesses her feelings then my response would be a yes.

She is beautiful. She is honest. She cares. She treats me like her best friend. She does not shy away from pointing out my stupidity. I am just another guy to her. Khushi is what I want in my otherwise static monotonous life. I smiled feeling the strange emotion bursting within me. It's already 3 AM. I need to make the necessary preparations.

I made my bed, went out for a walk and showered to have an early start. The rest of Raizadas were leaving for a religious trip to Vaishnodevi. They were surprised to see me up and ready for the day at 5 AM. Anjali Di and Vikram Jeeju were smiling from ear to ear. While the rest of them were trying to hide their enthusiasm. Only Dhruv was being normal around me. After a quick breakfast, I said my goodbyes to them and texted Khushi to meet me here in Shantivan.

I gathered a bunch of roses from the plants beside the pool. With utmost care, I tied them together. She would love a homemade present. As I wore the best three-piece suit that I had in my almirah, the phone on my nightstand vibrated twice.

Khushi messaged me that she would be here soon. At exact 8 am she arrived. There was no one home. Even HP had taken a day off.

I sprinted towards the main door. But then curbing my eagerness I kept the roses on a side table. First I will give Khushi the chance to reveal her feelings for me. Yes. That would be appropriate. Taking a deep breath I unbolted the door.

Khushi looked beautiful in red. An angel of sorts. The warmth in her eyes was absent this morning. Her cheeks were tinted but there were no traces of a smile on her otherwise cheerful face. For the first time, I felt uncomfortable around Khushi Gupta. This was not what I had anticipated last night. The coldness of her expressions gave me the chills. What is the actual reason behind this sudden meeting? Trying to control the situation I welcomed her into the house.

Khushi come inside.

She advanced towards the hall making me follow her involuntarily.  The silence from Khushi made me anxious. Her body language screamed hostility. My heart was beating wildly inside my chest. I  knew in the back of my mind that Khushi was about to do something rash. I could sense our bond wilting away. Dhak dhak. The distance made my heart jolt.

Khushi...

She spun around effortlessly and made eye contact with me. There was no Khushi inside those eyes. I gulped sensing the emptiness within them. Why? What is wrong? What have I done? Is something bothering her? Is she here to end...? I sensed her footsteps near me. Holding her phone in front of me she addressed me like a mere stranger. 

Listen Mr Raizada. I don't find you adorable at all. This text was meant for Dhruv. Do not assume that I am interested in you.

Khushi mera woh matlab nai tha main bas mazaak...

(Khushi I was only kidding...)

Mazaak?!? Aapke liye ye sab ek mazaak hoga humare liye nai. Ek baat apne dil mein utaar lijiye. Hum aapke liye kuch mehsoos nai krte.

(You were kidding?!? This might be a joke to you. But get one thing clear in your head. I don't feel anything for you).

Kuch feel nai krti...

(You don't feel anything...)

I murmured to myself. Time slowed down for me. The loud ticking of the clock echoed around me. The birds chirping outside felt like a deafening sound. This was not the confession that I wanted from her. Darkness reverberated within me as I comprehended her words. Kuch mehsoos nahi karti woh mere liye. I am not special to her. Heartbroken I tried to stop the tears that threatened to fall from my eyes. My throat tightened with every breath I took.

 I was wrong in my assumptions. She hates me! Khushi feels nothing for me. Nothing at all. Her expression morphed into anger as she stood only an inch away from me.

Humare liye uss baat ka koi matlab nai hai. Sunna aapne? Koi matlab nai hai!

(Exactly I don't give a damn about it. Did you hear me? You don't mean anything to me!)

Pushing me away she sauntered out of the house without giving me a chance to talk. I was about to follow her determined to clarify things before they escalated to the point of no return. However, her last sentence echoed in my mind like a broken record.

Koi matlab nai hai...

Koi matlab nai hai...

The four words were very familiar. Spoken by the same person. But this time the emotions were different. They were not unsure and hopeless. They were blunt and irreversible. I recognized them instantly. 

All of a sudden I found myself captured in my nightmare. I was no longer in the confines of Shantivan. Smoke surrounded me. Darkness made me blind. Breathlessly I tried to find my way out. I felt excruciating pain all over my shoulder bone. The sound of glass shattering hurt my ears. Amidst all that was happening, I heard the voice of Khushi Kumari Gupta.

Koi matlab nai hai...

Koi matlab nai hai...

The vulnerability in her voice made me gasp. Her heartbreak mirrored mine. Before my mind could comprehend everything bright white lights blinded my vision. Agonizing pain pushed me into a strange abyss. And then neither I felt anything nor I heard a sound.

Khushi POV

I did it. I finally verbalized what was bothering me for very long. I vented out my emotions to Arnav Singh Raizada. I made it clear to him that we can never be together.  I retorted him using the same words that he threw at me not long ago on Diwali night.

He won't flirt with me ever again. I won't give him a single opportunity to break my heart. I kept walking towards the main road feeling a strange sense of accomplishment. Although my little outburst is nothing in front of the insults and humiliation I faced in the past while in the company of ASR. Still, my little victory felt like a badge of honour that I carried with pride.

I was about to flag an auto rikshaw when something dawned upon me. My phone was missing. Oh no. Hey Devi Maiyya kahi hum apna fone Shantivan mein to nahi bhool gaye? Uh oh. I must have dropped the device while lashing out at Arnav Singh Raizada. Slapping my palm on my temple I trudged back to the Raizada house.

(Oh Lord by any chance did I drop my phone somewhere in Shantivan?)

Chill Khushi. You don't have to initiate any conversation with that man. Just step inside, look for your phone and simply disappear from the scene. Giving myself a pep talk I returned to Shantivan. The right side of the main door was still open. Just like I left it a few minutes ago. I peeked inside and to my relief, the hall appeared to be empty. With a happy sigh, I strolled inside. My phone was lying on the carpet near the sofa. I picked it up.

But my eyes widened in disbelief when I saw a familiar pair of trouser clad legs peeking from behind the three-seater sofa. Fear engulfed me. I felt a shiver run down my spine. Dragging my feet to the other side of the sofa I gasped at the sight in front of me. Arnavji was lying unconscious with a hand clutching his forehead. My knees gave out in response. Shaking him vigorously I screamed.

ARNAVJI...

ARNAVJI CAN YOU HEAR ME!!

Hey Devi Maiyya Arnavji ko kya hua? Ye behosh kaise hogaye? In hopes that a family member might be able to help him, I shouted for Anjaliji, Naniji, Akaashji and even HPji but only my voice resonated around the hall. It seems that Arnavji is alone in the house. It was a deja vu moment. In October also the same thing happened. It was only the two of us in Shantivan and Arnavji who had fainted due to low sugar levels. I mused. 

(Oh Devi Maiyya how did he faint all of sudden?)

Knowing that only I could help Arnavji, I Iifted him by the shoulders and made him lean against the sofa. He kept losing balance but after a few tries, I was able to make him lean on it. I rushed to the kitchen and brought a glass full of cold water.

I sprinkled a few drops over his face but nothing changed. Wetting my hands I rubbed his palms and forehead. I repeated the process thrice. To my immense relief, his fingers moved a little. I splashed more water on his face. His eyes fluttered open this time. He blinked furiously. My presence startled him.

Aap theek hain? Aap humein sun sakte hain?

(Are you alright? Can you hear me?)

He kept staring at me like a starving man. The intensity made me self conscious. I was about to ask him for water when he grabbed my wrist in a firm hold. His lips moved and he whispered in a voice too low for me to understand. I moved a little closer to hear him. His brow furrowed, his eyes darkened, and his bottom lip just barely jutted out.

Maine tumhara dil toda tha na...'Koi matlab nai hai'...you have used these words before.

(I broke your heart right...)

His statement shocked me. Hey Devi Maiyya he remembers my words from the Diwali night. I tried to disengage from him but his hold tightened around my wrist. Using his other hand he jerked my shoulder making me fall on him. I felt his lips grazing my ears and shuddered, at the sudden proximity.

Agar maine tumhe chot pahunchai hai to marham bhi main hi lagaunga.

(If I have hurt you in the past then only I have the right to heal your wounds).

I pushed and extricated myself from his touches. Sitting on my knees I straightened my dupatta. All this while he kept watching me like a hawk. I could sense the presence of the dominant ASR within him. Without saying another word I picked up the glass and left him.

No matter how ugly our arguments become, it is against humanity to leave him alone in such a condition. I returned with a fresh glass of water and made him sip it slowly. I could feel his eagle eyes on me. His actions were screaming possessiveness. And I did not like it one bit. How dare he decide to be the one to heal my wounds huh? Humein zakhm dekar marham lagane wale ye hote kaun hain.

I placed the glass on the floor and tried to get up. I immediately stood up and assisted him. He did not mind the help. Slowly and carefully we mounted the stairs and reached his room. I made him lie on the bed and turned to leave. I could feel his stare burning a hole inside me. As I neared the door of his bedroom Arnavji spoke again.

Mirror ke paas jo cabinet hain usse kholo.

(Open the cabinet next to the mirror).

I swirled around surprised by his commanding tone. It seemed like he was on a mission this morning. A mission to drive me crazy. I fisted my hand in an attempt to control my tongue. What does he think of himself? Arnavji must have realized his error because soon he changed his tone to a pleading one.

Please Khushi.

Rolling my eyes I dashed towards the cabinet and pulled the door with a little too much force. But my rage vanished in thin air. The contents inside the cabinet left me astonished for a few seconds. The pearls from my green dress, my broken glass bangle and a torn piece of my stole. What are they doing here? Why did Arnavji keep the fragments of my belongings with him? I touched the pearls with a trembling hand. He had these things with him from before the accident. Why? Why would he keep my stuff with him?

I turned around to face him. With his back against the headboard, Arnavji passed me a look of admiration. Frustrated by his behaviour I fired questions at him left right and centre.

Aapko sab kuch yaad aagaya kya? Aur ye humari cheezein aapke paas kyun hain?

(Have you recalled everything? And why do you have my stuff in your possession?)

Sab yaad nai aaya hai. Par itna to pta chal gaya ki jis aurat ki dard bhari awaaz mere kaano mein goonjti hai woh tum ho Khushi Kumari Gupta. Maine tumhe kaise hurt kia tell me now?

(No I don't remember everything. But one thing is crystal clear that you are the woman whose painful voice echoes in my dream Khushi Kumari Gupta. How did I hurt you tell me now?)

He stood up from the bed and started advancing towards me. The burning questions of his past reflected in his chocolate orbs. I could not help but retreat with every step that he took. Eventually, my back hit his almirah and he shackled me by placing his arms on either side of my head.

Hum apni zindagi mein aage badhchuke hain. Aur in sari baaton ka koi fayda nai hai. Ab raasta chodiye.

(I have moved on in my life. Your words don't mean anything at this point. Now leave my way).

His eyes widened hearing my answer. Arnavji's nostrils flared and his jaw turned more rigid if possible. That was the wrong thing to say. However, I was not in the mood to be a doormat for him to stomp at. My glare mirrored his in a show of defiance. Watching my stance he leaned away from me. But the fire inside did not extinguish.

So you have chosen Siddharth Shukla huh?!? Then why do you spend time with me? If I am that bad to phir abhi meri help kyun kri? Khushi the old me had pieces of your belongings. They are enshrined over here. And you do not wish to break off our connection. This means we still have a chance...

I scoffed at his explanation. Only Arnav Singh Raizada possesses the ability to pull me when I am trying so hard to push him away.  He always hated my ignorance. But the old him never verbalised his innermost feelings. ASRs ego loved to dominate and control.

Strangely his absence felt alien to me. This bold and vocal version of Arnavji began to spook me.

So what if I choose Sid? Why do you always have to crush my happiness? And what exactly are you suggesting by saying we have a chance? Hum Lavanya Kashyap nai hai. Humein aapke sath live in mein koi interest nai hai. Iss sach ko swikar lijiye. Aapke kiye acha hoga.

(I ain't Lavanya Kashyap. I don't wish for a live-in with you. You need to accept this reality. That will be good for you).

Pushing his chest I sauntered out of the den that belonged to Arnav Raizada when his steel-like voice uttered something that froze my feet. My ears kept ringing as my mind registered his confession.

I like you Khushi. Aur ab main humara past jaankar hi rahunga. Is sach ko tum bhi swikar lo. Kyunki ye humare future ke liye acha hoga.

(And now I am adamant about figuring out my past. You need to accept this reality too. That will be good for our future).

Dhak dhak

Dhak dhak

My heart raced as it acknowledged the words of Mr Raizada. Arnavji likes me?? Woh humein pasand krte hain?!? What? How did this...? When did he...? The questions perplexed me. My mind wanted to stop his advances but my heart thrilled as he bared his soul to me for the first time. 

Instead of twirling and acknowledging his words, I stared into the mirror beside me. He stood a few feet away from me with clenched hands and a stiff posture. Strange desperation crossed his features. He probably expected a response from me. His sudden confession made me restless. So instead I chose to leave Shantivan but not before announcing something for his benefit.

Humne Anjaliji ko aapki haalat ke baare mein bata dia hai. Thodi der mein koi na koi aajayega.

(I have informed Anjaliji about your condition. Somebody will be here in a while).

Arnav POV

The darkness disappeared as I found myself surrounded by the woman who I least expected to be near me. Slowly my mind was decoding the hidden clues of my past. It was pretty clear that at some point in my life I had feelings for Khushi. I had a hidden corner in my room filled with her stuff. Also according to my family, I was a cold-hearted businessman before my accident, which means that I hated Khushi's guts. And Khushi acknowledged a couple of times that we were always at loggerheads with each other.

Now I just have to piece all these clues together. However, I was clear about one thing in my head. That I cannot do all of this without Khushi Gupta. I have feelings for this woman. And I need her constant companionship. So I tried to make her understand my point. I could see that Khushi was still upset about our earlier argument but still she took me upstairs and gave my comfort the priority.

I showed her my little shrine. I asked for a chance. And I finally admitted my need to have her in my life. Khushi assumed that my offer was limited to a live in. But I made it clear to her what she meant for me.

I like you Khushi. Aur ab main humara past jaankar hi rahunga. Is sach ko tum bhi swikar lo. Kyunki ye humare future ke liye acha hoga.

She stood still and did not show any signs of acknowledging my words. I waited for a very long minute. But instead of giving any indication of her feelings, Khushi told me that she had informed my family about my fainting spell. Those were her last words to me as she left my room, my home and my heart.

I rubbed my chest feeling the acute pain in my heart. I longed to be with her again. Damn it. Today has been exhausting for me. Nothing went according to my plans. I sat on the bed feeling burdened by today's events. But there is a silver lining over here. Khushi's previous words triggered my memory. I now know that we shared a strange and intense relationship. But the major chunks of my memory remain undisclosed. 

I need to make every effort to know more about my history with Khushi Gupta. And for that my best options are 1. To join the office once again and retrieve info on Khushi 2. Coaxing Akaash to tell me about my equation with Khushi. And 3. To hover around Ms Gupta to make her confess what she is trying to hide.

I smirked feeling triumphant because I knew my plans would be successful. I knew who I had to contact first. Pulling out the drawer of my nightstand I picked up the business card of Aman Mathur. I met him here during Di and Jeeju's anniversary party. At that time my mind was occupied by Khushi's thoughts. But now was the perfect time to get in touch with him.

Bhai?! Bhai? Are you alright?

A concerned Akaash rushed inside my bedroom. I rolled my eyes at his alarming behaviour but allowed him to mother hen me for a while. Khushi did mention informing my family of my fainting episode. I could see the guilt oozing out of him. Damn it. Soon the entire Raizada clan will go berserk because of this little incident of mine.

I am fine Akaash.

But bhai I feel so bad...

My brother's remorseful words faded in the background as my mind drifted back to the moment when I had pushed her body towards me. Her enchanting jasmine scent still lingered around me. Her trembling frame against me as I whispered my regret in her ears. Her beautiful expressive eyes widened as she retreated from me. My very own aphrodisiac. My musings came to a halt when I felt a worried Akaash cupping my shoulders.

...Bhai? You don't look alright to me.

Relax Akaash. I was just trying to figure out something. I need your help with a few things.

Sure Bhai. Anything for you.

An hour later I was sitting on one of the chaises on the mezzanine floor of Shantivan. Across me sat a bewildered Akaash unable to understand my sudden demands. And beside him stood my manager Aman Mathur who was smiling ear to ear hearing the news of my return to ARD.  After giving the basic gist about our business he answered all my questions regarding Khushi Gupta. 

 Every new piece of information on Khushi felt like a priceless artefact. Her middle name is Kumari. Her devotion to Devi Maiyya. Her headstrong approach towards life. Her defiance against my egotistical behaviour. I devoured the facts that he shared with me. However, my joy vanished when I heard about certain events that were intentionally staged by me to hurt her. Horrified listening to my sins I could do nothing but feel regret.

Falling from the first floor, standing in a heavy storm to handle the parking duty, getting stuck in a building on the verge of collapsing and so on. 

What the hell?!? I was a beast to Khushi. Now her hatred for me during our first few meetings makes perfect sense. I pulled the roots of my hair realising the fact that my past self is the villain of my very own love life. Ughhhh. Gosh, what is the point of being this great ruthless businessman ASR if I cannot even see how making Khushi mine would be a long term investment with profitable results for my heart?

Instead because of my foolish attempts to protect my ego I made it easier for people like Shukla who are not leaving any stones unturned to woo Khushi. 

My competition is tough. I need to make every effort to ensure that Khushi does not give up on me. Yes. We will only move forward from now on. There is no other way out for me. Only Khushi's presence can heal me emotionally. Determined to have Khushi in my life I cocked my head to stare at  Aman and Akaash. The two waited breathlessly for my next declaration. Smirking at the fellas I stated my decision.

By next week I will introduce a new shareholder of AR Designs.

Who?

They enquired in stereo. I stood up with my hands across my chest, head held high and a victorious smile. A streak of possessiveness resounded inside me as I announced the name of the iron lady who had done something strange to my heart.

Khushi Kumari Gupta.

Gasps echoed around me. But I did not bother about their reactions. Heading towards my bedroom I unlocked my device and googled the different articles on wooing women who are strong and independent.

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Precap: Khushi is perplexed by the over growing possessiveness of Arnav Singh Raizada. ASR returns to ARD.